Today is the REAL first day of the new year for the Ticket Ranger family - this morning the alarm clock goes off and we re-start the daily routine of school runs, childcare drop offs and then head off to work ourselves!

The day the Christmas festivities officially have to come to an end (Eating Celebrations for breakfast aside...)

 



So after a morning of trying to find a missing school shoe, attempting to brush and plait a 2 year old’s hair who acts as if the hairbrush is made of needles and razor blades, and of course coming to terms with the fact that I have to get out of my pyjamas and into real clothes for the first time since we broke up for the Christmas hols - I have decided to get into the ‘Let’s write a list of stuff we should do this year but probably never will’ spirit and make me some resolutions!

And what could be more fun than compiling a list of unrealistic goals for the year ahead?? Doing them with a Disney theme! Makes it all the more magical, I am sure you will agree.

Here we go...

 

1. Make wild animals do all the household chores.

Image credit - Disney
Image credit - Disney

This year I plan on training the woodland creatures living local(ish) to our somewhat urban home to fly in through any open windows/doors that are ajar and clean the piled-up sink full of dirty dishes with their cute little fluffy bunny tails. Let’s not stop with the washing up though, squirrels seem the ideal size to get down the toilet and use their bristly behinds to shift any unwanted marks down there. Actually, is there any marks inside a toilet bowl that IS wanted?! Let’s move on!

There is a pigeon loft in the allotments behind our garden – I fully plan on utilising this as their feathery placement is perfect for swooping in and hanging out the washing by picking up our undies in their beaks and flying them out to the washing line! (NOTE TO SELF: Try to find a woodland creature that is good at actually fixing washing lines, as ours snapped and Daddy Ticket Ranger has never got round to fixing it.)

 

2. Do not let our Tumbly’s get rumbly.

Image Credit - Disney
Image Credit - Disney

This one is a bit woaah and out there, since most people will be starting the new year with a diet plan, a lot of motivation and some new batteries for their bathroom scales. Here at Ticket Rangers we are going to leave our bathroom scales where they are (battery-less and dusty in the bottom of the cupboard) and we are going to set the more achievable, and much more fun, goal of banning tummy rumbles in 2019.

Basically it’s gonna go like this…

If you are peckish, snack*.

If you are hungry, eat*.

If you are thirsty, down a bottle of wine and call it at least 2 of your 5 a day!

We are very lucky that we have full cupboards in our home when there are so many people that do not, and just like everybody out there – we only have this one life to enjoy, so while its probably a good idea to no longer stir my morning cuppa with a mint matchmaker rather than a spoon as I have done for pretty much the whole of December, and maybe to actually add some vegetables to the kid’s evening meals (not gonna lie here, we will probably hide them in there and just hope they accidentally eat them unwittingly) I do think that life is too short to not just eat the cake, so to speak. And so in 2019 why not live life as Pooh Bear does, and wholeheartedly agree with him when he asks ‘What could be better than a little something to eat?’

*Please only eat pots of honey as per the Hundred Acre Wood guidelines, by scooping it out using your whole paw and licking it from your fur. Or alternatively, if you are not a bear, just pop a small smackerel on your overnight oats.

 

3. Save money by trying to find alternative uses for everyday household objects I already own.

Image Credit - Disney
Image Credit - Disney

As a nation, I feel like we spend so much money on ‘stuff’, and as a family we are certainly in that category with the rest of England. I am that person that pops out for a loaf of bread and comes home with a new Ski Suit, when I have never and will never go skiing. I seem to have a real talent for accumulating random stuff. You want thingabobs? I got twenty!

To combat this, I feel like the best and only sensible way is to make the most of the gadgets and gizmos a plenty that are lying all round the place! There are whosits and whatsits galore in our house!
Car is on it’s last legs, save up for a new one? No way, I am fully expecting my Godmother (looking at you here Auntie Maureen) to knock me up a carriage with an old pumpkin left over from Halloween.

Pepper spray for when out and about on an evening by myself? Not needed - I have a large handbag, I will just stick a frying pan in there. Worked for Rapunzel.

New hairbrush? Nope not me, I am gonna be brushing my hair with my fork in 2019.

This year I aim to not buy a single bottle of make up remover or face wipe, instead I am just going to wear really large sleeves and with one quick swipe across my face, the make up will be gone Mulan style. I can’t believe I hadn’t thought of this before to be honest.

We are going to be rich with all these savings to be made!!

 

4. Learn to whistle to enhance work rate and productivity.

Image Credit - Disney
Image Credit - Disney

Now this one may be tricky. In all of my 21 (ahem) years on this planet, I have just not been able to get the hang of whistling. “It’s easy, you just purse your lips together and blow” says everyone I ever tell. But they sharp stop talking about how simple it is when they see my attempt. I say ‘see’ because my mouth looks like a cats rear end and because they can’t hear it… no noise comes out, just a load of spit.

However, as this year we have big exciting plans for our website, www.ticketrangers.com, which is going to involve a LOT of hard work, I feel like I really need nail this whistling malarkey so that I can be more productive and get more done during our working hours. I plan on following the grand advice of the 7 most hard working and honest grafters I have ever had the pleasure to watch in cartoon form, and whistle while I work. Apparently that way it won’t take long when there’s a song to help me set the pace. Sounds ideal.

The seven dwarves aren’t the only one encouraging this work boosting trick though, Disney seems to be full of whistle advocates...

Deadline looming but facebook is tempting you and the urge is very strong? Give a little whistle according to Pinocchio.

Need reassurance that your work is fighting the good fight and helping people? Pick up a ukulele and go for a wander while whistling the most ear wormy tune ever played - ‘Whistle Stop’ just like the rooster on Robin Hood.

Need to feather your nest with very little time to rest? Toot a merry tune cos you just know a song will move the job along!

OK that last one only applies to birds, but you get my point. Whistling, I am coming for you!

 

5. Choose to seek help, solace and positivity from PROPER inspirational quotes and lines from movies.



I love a good beginning of year motivational line me. You know the kind I mean – ‘New Year, New Me’, ‘Out with the old, in with the new’ etc etc. That’s not a joke, I really do like a fresh start quote.

But this year I don’t feel like we NEED a fresh start, I feel like we are in a good place as we are, and rather than start with a clean slate we are happy continue along the bumpy road of ups and downs that we are already on. It hasn’t been an easy year by any means, but it hasn’t been a particularly difficult one either, so we don’t feel like we need the first chapter in an empty 365 page book, thankfully we are going to aim for more of a sequel which carries on from where we left off in 2018.

All joking aside though, this really IS our new year’s resolution for this year. Life throws some crazy things your way, sometimes unexpected, other times they are things you knew were coming. They can be occasionally good, as well as occasionally being not so good.

That’s life.

And so we are turning to Disney for quotes to live by in 2019, and we would like to share them with you and hope that you too can put them to good use in times of need or remember them when you need some guidance. Because you know as well as we do that nothing inspires you like a cute cartoon elephant with big ears…

 
“The very things that hold you down are going to lift you up.” - Timothy Mouse (Dumbo)

 
“Venture outside your comfort zone. The rewards are worth it.” - Rapunzel (Tangled)


“You’ve got a friend in me.” - Toy Story

 
“The seaweed is always greener in somebody elses lake” - Sebastian (The Little Mermaid)

 
“The things that make me different are the things that make me ME.” - Piglet (Winnie the Pooh)

 
“If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.” - Thumper (Bambi)

 
“Muscle up Buttercup” - Maui (Moana)

 
“Giving up is for rookies!” - Phil (Hercules)


and finally, the best advice that has ever been bestowed, in or out of the sea, came from our favourite fish in the Big Blue World. She keeps it simple, yet perfect. So if you only do one thing this year, through your good times and definitely through the bad, then remember what Dory says and

“Just keep swimming.”

 
All the best, from Julie, Phil, Niall and Martha, aka, the Ticket Rangers :)

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